My cup runneth over. So do my tits.
It’s been several days since I got my milk supply. On the first night, it was so overwhelming that I called the lactation consultants from the hospital at 2 a.m. and then called the maternity ward like it was an emergency hotline because I had no idea what to do with this massive engorgement and the pain I was in.
On the first day and night at the hospital post-C-section, I was blissfully unaware of what reality awaited me soon after. Since I had over two weeks of antenatal colostrum collection experience and my newborn was latching like a dream, I turned their lactation consultant away. In my defense, she fear-mongered us, saying our baby lost 8% of her birth weight when the limit they start to worry about was seven. We were so eager to leave the hospital that I accepted the brochure and kindly let her know I’d be in touch (with absolutely no clue my breasts would soon be requesting a second opinion).
It’s been 72 hours since I started frantically YouTubing and Google-searching every question I had about managing my milk supply.
In my humble opinion, clogged milk ducts are hard as rocks and will throw any unsuspecting postpartum mom into a spiral. And contrary to popular belief, no, throwing a $700 electric pump on your boobies is not the solution to your milk supply. I was so eager to find relief that I learned everything I could about managing postpartum milk.
For viewers’ discretion, I was blessed in the highest for my milk supply. I am somewhere between a manageable milk farm and a very respectful oversupply. I can’t speak for experts or anyone struggling with their breastfeeding journey. What I can do is speak from the bane of my experience, share what I’ve learned, and perhaps save even one woman from the hurling of a newborn who can’t latch due to engorgement. Both oversupply and undersupply have their unique and totally valid challenges. This article is particularly directed to new moms who spawned entire Rockies in their breasts and who can barely move due to the pain of adjusting to an overnight oversupply.
For context, I was both prideful and completely oblivious to what oversupply really looks like. It’s like being handed a million bucks but not knowing what to do with it, how to manage it, or how to multiply it sustainably. So instead, you spend it recklessly and then frantically try to keep up with the demand of your otherwise new “nepo titty” lifestyle.
On the day my milk supply came in, my mom and sister concurrently visited for the first time, too. They spent the day feeding the baby while I showed off my new bosoms and Eufy S2 Pro. (It lights up, you know.) My first mistake was pumping both left and right for a full thirty minutes on the highest suction and heat setting. (Those who know, know. Those who don’t… well, you do now.) I pumped a total of six ounces (approximately two to three newborn feeds) in that single go. Not to mention, my mom and sister fed the baby maybe four times in the span of their five-hour visit.
My second mistake was not knowing what to do with that… hours later.
That evening was the very shell-shocking experience of my first massive engorgement. It’s safe to say the experience was so traumatic that I published this whole article about it. I called the maternity unit like it was a crisis hotline.
Luckily, this was my first real chance at learning how to milk and manage my supply wisely. Since then, the Eufy and I have worked together for relief purposes only, and I almost exclusively use the Medela Harmony hand pump for manual expression.
Clearly, receiving such abundance and knowing how to steward it were two very different things. I had mastered the light show on my breast pump before learning when to turn it off. So, with my pride slightly deflated and my breasts wholeheartedly otherwise, I started learning the following:
Pump only to the point of relief.
One of my biggest breastfeeding revelations was learning that emptying your breasts is actually kind of a myth. Unless you’re deliberately power-pumping to increase your supply or store more (freezing or intentionally building a stash), you should really only be pumping for engorgement and/or clogged duct relief and then breastfeeding the rest. Emphasis on “relief”. This might even help your baby access the hindmilk faster, since foremilk is mainly for ‘hydration’ and quick energy while hindmilk satisfies appetite, promotes weight gain, and supports your baby’s brain development.
Hand massage very lightly.
Clogged milk ducts were the first side effect of my oversupply, and I can’t overstate how frightening it can be to feel massive lumps in your breasts. I learned that most clogged ducts can sometimes take two days to fully clear and, to be honest, I didn’t have the courage to research what long-term clogged ducts can lead to. I don’t have the stomach for it… or should I say the boobs? Hand-massaging an already painful udder can feel like literal torture. That’s why it’s more about softly, let’s say, “poking” your breast tissue. I recommend two or three fingers pressing gently but firmly against the clogged contents and toward the center of the breast. Either baby will extract it through suction or the pump will.
In rare but dire circumstances (or if my rotating manual pumps are both being cleaned at the same time), the electric pump is set to slow and just the right amount of suction to mimic the baby’s. I press the duct for a few seconds and then let go after as many squirts as I need to feel relief.
Another tip I got for when engorgement limits the baby’s ability to latch is to make a “W” with your fingers against your nipple and push lightly inward toward your chest. I can’t explain it, nor do I fully understand the science, but somehow, with the letdown, this really helps the baby latch.
Have a calm and peaceful pumping/breastfeeding routine.
This was initially written about pumping, but it really helps to have a calm atmosphere when you’re breastfeeding your baby. But on the night of my first panic pump, I literally had to retreat to the exact routine I had when I was collecting colostrum antenatally. I would turn on The Good Doctor, perch up at a forty-five-degree angle, pump slowly, and massage slowly. It was the only way to calm already overwhelmed breast tissue… and an extremely overwhelmed postpartum me.
Follow and stick to the schedule... OR, go all in and cluster feed.
My sister-in-law taught me this when I worked as her nanny two years ago. The outside world doesn’t always understand why you follow a schedule, but I’ll tell you, trying to remember the last feed and explicitly following a baby’s hunger cues is the single biggest mistake new mothers make.
I took a template from the internet, put it into ChatGPT to make it my own (making the time intervals and wake-to-feed windows more vague/open since she’s a newborn), and literally use it as my phone background to keep to a mild schedule from day one. Mild because I try to follow some form of routine while acknowledging that the baby still thinks she’s in my womb. Managing your time wisely goes a long way toward managing your incoming milk supply. ‘Cause turns out, even boobs can use a personal assistant sometimes.
Since initially writing this section, I’ve started cluster feeding and becoming more familiar with the baby’s natural feeding rhythm. I do still occasionally look at the clock so I know whether it’s worth waking her up to feed. If she’s gone too long, let’s say, napping, I’ll wake her up to feed. But for the most part, she usually demands the boob right on schedule.
Learn about your baby’s need-per-feed demands for each stage of their development and stay within them.
It’s all “let the baby tell you how hungry they are” until you mistake stomach/hunger pains for colic. No, your baby isn’t colicky—perhaps you measured your feeds by how much you love your baby, or let the newborn tell you when he or she is ready for brunch. But in the interim, you forgot that, for the first few weeks of life, your infant’s belly is the size of a walnut, capable of only handling certain quantities at a time—while totally confusing you with their ever-growing appetite for more.
Major tip: They said to keep pissing the baby off until they’re really done feeding. Usually, a feed should be about 30-45 minutes to adequately receive enough milk via the breast. (I’m currently exclusively breastfeeding/pumping for storage, and have learned that baby will fall back asleep multiple times throughout her feeds before she’s fully satisfied.)
Take your breastfeeding journey seriously.
This is not the time to let everyone bottle-feed your baby because it’s an Instagrammable moment. Now I see why moms will leave the room to pump or breastfeed in peace. Engorgement and oversupply can be incredibly hard and painful. They can complicate a baby’s latch (due to nipple confusion from bottle-feeding) and leave everyone overwhelmed and overstimulated… especially baby and mother. I’ve personally breastfed my baby since birth and exclusively fed breast milk since my supply came in. I only have formula as an emergency or on-the-go option. And even my husband takes a back seat to the breastfeeding. Though, for bonding and relief purposes, I do set aside a portion of the engorgement-relief pump sessions for my husband to take over emergency feeds—whether I’m over-exhausted during a night-shift or moments when the saxophones are getting louder. We don’t play with the nutrition and growth of our baby. We understand that we’ve been trusted to protect our baby’s health, and tending to each feed responsibly is one of our top priorities.
Eat well.
I’ll throw this one into the mix because I am genuinely convinced there is a link between the two. My philosophy is always a blend of healthy, whole foods, but I also don’t shy away from my carbs and fats. I think there’s a link between well-fed mothers (metaphorically and literally) and their supply. I’ve also made sure to keep my postpartum as stress-free as possible. The equation is just as much feeding myself as it is feeding my baby.
A last few things…
Part of stewarding your abundant supply wisely is bearing the weight and the pain of your cross. No one said this would be easy, but it actually can be easi…er.
Sometimes the worst of it is just navigating everything for the first time and learning those lessons the hard way. If I hadn’t overfed and underfed my baby, I wouldn’t have taken her schedule and supply so seriously. If it weren’t for the disheartening experience of my baby being unable to latch, I wouldn’t have learned how to manage engorgement or why it’s best not to introduce bottles until after six weeks (unless recommended by your lactation consultant or pediatrician). And if I hadn’t had that one massive mommy-and-baby breakdown, I wouldn’t have understood the importance of tracking and honoring my baby’s feed-and-sleep schedule.
When I was in the heat of my lactational meltdown, I reached out to so many people looking for answers. I learned that oversupply is actually a fairly rare occurrence, and a lot of people couldn’t give me advice because they simply couldn’t relate. With that, I learned to be grateful for the challenges I faced on my unique breastfeeding journey, but also to steward this abundant supply wisely. After all, there are mothers praying to pump two ounces in a session (let alone a letdown); but it came to me naturally.
Intentional stewardship means taking it upon yourself to learn, adapt, and stay disciplined. Go to the lactation consultants, ask those million questions, Google, read—heck, create your own schedule and make it your phone background like I did. Anything to see the privilege of easily providing for your child and respecting that gift by managing it with care.
Lastly, I often experience the deep inner-body pain of my supply resurging. It can be uncomfortable, and even baby’s latch can be toe-curling sometimes. I’ve been graced by God with a complication-free baby. No tongue ties. No painful latch (though those first few days did a number on my nipples). And even then, this can sometimes bring me a pain that goes deep into the soma. With that, I’ve treated every feed like the sacred experience it is and applied those cold compresses (literal ice packs) to relieve the engorgement, soothe the pain, and slow the letdown reflex.
That being said, cabbage is next on the list, and who knows, perhaps the cabbage era will have pages of its own.
Until then, I’m learning to receive God’s abundance with gratitude—and a very supportive nursing bra.
